Time of my Life

I think back to 3 years ago all. the. time. And especially lately, with so many of my friends getting married. I just think back to how perfect it was for me. July 5th, 2008 was absolutely, hands-down, the best day of my life. And I'm not just saying that because it sounds good or because you're supposed to say that about your wedding day. It really was.

And the weeks surrounding it are right up there too. The week before the big day was full of hanging out with friends and family. Literally, just hanging out on our back porch.

And the week after was my first week as Brad's wife. Our honeymoon was our first big adventure as husband and wife.

It was all so sweet and I find myself thinking back to that time so often - wishing I could go back and do it all over again.

Unlike many brides I know, I absolutely LOVED planning my wedding. Sure, it was stressful at times, but only because I was trying to juggle wedding planning, working, going to school and graduating, finding a full time job, and finding a place to live all at the same time. But really... REALLY... I loved the planning. I'd do it all again and again if I could (back up career choice, maybe?!).

Also unlike many brides, I don't remember feeling stressed or nervous leading up to the wedding. I only remember a little bit of family drama, but what family doesn't have that surround something like a wedding?! All I can remember is having fun! Maybe 5 and a half years coming helped a little with that?!

And then the wedding day came. And it was all I had hoped for!

We had a little rain shower scare right before the ceremony, but I think it was just good luck! The ceremony was beautiful! The perfect representation of Brad and I coming together as best friends, husband and wife, one before God. I love that man. I really do. I love him more now than I did then. And I'm sure it will just get better.

And after we were pronounced man and wife, it was time for the party to begin. And begin, it did. It was the best party I can ever remember attending. And again, I'm serious. It's not just because it was my party or because I'm supposed to say that. It really was amazing having all of my friends and family there dancing, eating, and having a splendid time. I didn't want it to end!

  

So here's to memories. The good kind. The BEST kind. And to making many more with him :)

Blessings and Conviction

I attended a retreat this weekend put on by the women's ministry of Terranova (my church!). Besides the fact that I was not feeling 100% (I had no voice, in fact! which made for lovely worship singing!) the weekend could not have gone better! The weather was gorgeous, the location was breathtaking, and the women were absolutely amazing! We really shared our hearts and got to know one another on a genuine level - something many people can be scared of doing. It can be messy. But it's real. It's beautiful.

God has been really reminding me lately of two things, which He pointed out again to me specifically this weekend.

First of all, He has been showing me what a wonderful thing community is in my life. I'm not talking about just being a part of a community (geographically, culturally, spiritually). I'm talking about having people in my life that really KNOW me for me. Who are brave enough to share their real selves with me. Who I can lean on, encourage, hold accountable, and really do life with. I have been unbelievably blessed with people with whom I do just that. And God has shown me that is something that I need - that all believers need, for that matter.

The second thing is more of a conviction that I feel I need to share. God has really been calling me out on my relationship with Him. Do I put Him first? Do I love Him first? I am an extremely relational person. And so I need community in my life. But sometimes I lean too much on that community and too little on God. Do you know what I mean? When I'm going through something difficult and could really use prayer and encouragement, who is the first one I turn to? Is it God? It should be. Yet it's not always, especially lately. I yearn for love and approval from those who know me best. And that's not necessarily wrong. It's natural for me to want affirmation from my close friends and family. Affirmation is one of my love languages, after all. But is that where I'm getting my sense of worth? I feel I need to spend some time really letting my Father love me. Do I deserve His love? Absolutely not - that's a whole nother story for a whole nother blog post :) But I need to accept His love and His approval of me before anyone else's. He is the only One who can fully know me and fully love me. I am undeserving, yet He, the Creator of the universe, has chosen to call me His child! Why isn't He the one I run to when something exciting is going on and I just can't wait to tell someone? He, after all, is my biggest fan. He made me me :)

Things I LOVE about November

November is my absolute favorite month of the year! No, it's not JUST because it's my birthday month {see #3 below}, although that definitely plays a part. I love November for sooooo many reasons! Here are my top 10 (in no particular order):

(1) Cool-ER weather. This is the month that we {finally} consistently see some cooler weather here in Texas! Sleeping with windows open & letting that crisp, cool air in is SO nice! Plus, I'm a fan of cool weather clothes... :)

(2) My Exam. No, I am not excited about my exam, but this year it is on November 2nd (tomorrow). And since I don't find out my results until January, and therefore won't know which exam to study for yet, I get to spend 28 of the 30 days of November NOT STUDYING!

(3) My birthday. I'm slightly selfish and absolutely LOVE my birthday. Sure, part of it is being spoiled & getting all of that attention, but it's mainly because I get to share it with the people closest to me. Plus, I'm both a Words of Encouragement and Gifts love language person, and both are usually lavished upon me by my friends and family... which makes me feel unbelievably loved & blessed!

(4) Fall colors & smells. Red, Orange, Gold, Brown... :) And the yummy cinnamon smelling candles (I just changed my Scentsy scent to Autumn Sunset.... yay!) I just can't get enough of it all!

(5) Movies. The good movies start coming out in November. This year, I've been counting down the days until Morning Glory (November 10th) and HP7 Part 1 (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1) (November 19). I can't wait to see these - and not feel guilty about having fun instead of studying!

(6) November is the eleventh month of the year. And 11 is one of my favorite numbers (second only to 7, which happens to be the day of the month I was born on!) Yay for primes!

(7) THANKSGIVING! Food, Family, Friends, God, Football, Thankfulness, Parades... Enough said!

(8) Decorating for Christmas! One of my absolute favorite things to do in November is prepare for Christmas. Bring out the tree, the ornaments, the manger, the snowmen, and let's not forget the MUSIC! It's the most wonderful time of the year!

(9) Shopping! Between all the coupons I get from my favorite stores {is it because I shop there so often?!} and Christmas shopping (not to mention Black Friday), I do quite a bit of damage in November! I will say, I love searching for the perfect items to give to my family and friends. I guess it's that love language again!

(10) I don't know what it is - the holidays, the weather... - but people are just more cheerful in November. And cheerful people make me happy.
   

What do you love about November?

Happy National Day of Encouragement!

Today is the National Day of Encouragement!

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." - 1 Thessalonians 5:11

I have been so blessed with sources of encouragement all around me! And it sure feels like I've needed it recently! My family is amazing - always there for me no matter what. I don't know what I'd do without them! My friends - new and old, far and near - are one of the biggest blessings to me. They love me for me and are ready to encourage me at any moment. I am so blessed.

Over the last couple of months, I have been reading a blog daily called (in)courage. It's basically a group of women who have a heart for community and for the Lord. I love waking up and reading what they have to share. It's an encouragement to see that others - even those I don't know - have been through the same kinds of things I have. These women share their hearts through this blog and it has seriously been an encouragement!

A few weeks ago, in anticipation of today, the ladies at (in)courage set out a challenge. They provided beautiful cards from DaySpring and asked that we (their readers, their friends) would use the cards to encourage those around us. Well, if you know me at all, you know that sending cards of encouragement is one of the things I love to do :)

I'm sort of going out on a limb with the card I'm sending tomorrow. It's so much easier for me to send cards to those I love. In fact, sometimes I get the urge to just go browse the card section and find a card for one of my friends. But this time, I'm sending my card to someone I don't know very well. But I know that she is going through a really hard time and needs the encouragement desperately. She is not a believer and I can tell that she is in need of love. I'm praying that my card will give her a glimmer of hope.

What has encouragement meant in your life? How will you encourage someone today?

A Birthday... week?!

As of last Friday when I woke up (24 hours before my first intermediate goal), I only had 1/2 a pound to lose! I thought to myself, "Okay Lesley, this is totally do-able! Just think of those 15 downloads and you can make it!"

Well, when I first made these intermediate goals I forgot one detail... my birthday (goal #1) falls on a Saturday this year. Had it fallen on a Friday, I would have woken up on the morning of my birthday and "weighed in" before all of the celebrations began. Apparently when your birthday falls on a Saturday and you have amazing coworkers and an awesome husband, Friday is the official beginning of the festivities. Not only did my friends at work bring me DELICIOUS mini cupcakes, Brad decided to surprise me after work by taking me on my birthday date that night. We went to the Alamo Drafthouse to see Where the Wild Things Are and then indulged in chocolate fondue at The Melting Pot for dessert. The food coma that inevitably followed caused me to go straight to bed when I got home. It was a wonderful night, but needless to say, I didn't reach my first goal.

The birthday festivities continued through Saturday (dinner at Tokyo Steakhouse with friends), Sunday (lunch at Macaroni Grill with family), and Monday (breakfast pastries from more coworkers). I feel extremely blessed to have so many people in my life that love me and want to spoil me :) Now that I've reverted back to my *normal* eating pattern and put in some extra workouts, I'm finally recovered from the weight gain over the weekend. I'm back to where I was the day before my birthday. I seem to have been set back about 5 days, which, in my opinion is not too bad considering all of the "presents" I ate!

So below you'll see my *revised* graph. Like I said before, each intermediate goal stands on its own. So I have until Thanksgiving (morning - before all the celebration this time!) to lose 5 pounds from where I was on my birthday. The dotted light gray line in the graph is the path that will get me there. The dotted green line was my original path. Hopefully I'll be able to get back on that track soon!

Next goal: Thanksgiving

Next reward: New outfit for the cruise!

November - The Month of Motivation!

Well, after a wonderful weekend at home (New Braunfels) visiting with family and participating in the sausage-filled tradition of Wurstfest, I decided to start November off with a new mind-set. I don't know what inspired my new found motivation - it could have been the awesome weekend, "fall back", the beautiful weather, the message at church on Sunday, or a combination of all of these - but I am proud to say that I am 3 for 3 on days I've exercised in November! AND not to mention that I SURVIVED Wurstfest, Halloween, and Terranova's Fall Festival (not the healthiest combination of events in one weekend) without giving into temptations! I didn't deprive myself completely, of course... I had some chocolate. But not near a "normal" Lesley amount! It's nice to see that this self-control is showing up on the scale! I have 4 days left and 1.2 pounds to lose. It's gonna be tight, but that 15 song reward is keeping me from giving up! Now for another dose of motivation... off to watch The Biggest Loser!

the big picture of ME

Though I am at work almost all of my waking hours, my job does not define me. Up until a year ago, the question I was always prepared to answer when I met someone new was "What grade are you in?" or at least something to that effect. I loved being a student. But school didn't define me. In our culture, we tend to define people by what they do. A job is a huge part of your life. It's what you do "for a living". It's one of the first questions that's asked when you're meeting someone new or describing yourself to someone. Though I'm constantly asked, I have yet to find the perfect answer to "You're a what? ...what's an actuary?" But really, I wake up everyday with the same task at hand: going to work and doing my job... then coming home to study. It's a good thing I like what I do. But no matter how much I like it or how much time I spend there, my job does not define me. I am so much more than an actuary.

I have an amazing husband! And though he's one of the hugest parts of my life, my husband does not define me. Though we haven't even been married a year, it feels like Brad's been in my life forever. He is my best friend and it's such a blessing to get to "do life" with him! I love having someone to count on and to take care of! I love coming home to a delicious home-cooked meal (yes, I have my own personal chef!) and I enjoy taking care of my home. We are team. We are the best team! But my husband does not define me. I am so much more than a wife.

I could not live without my friends... but my friends do not define me. I am friends with lots of people, but the people who really come into my life stay in. Looking back, I can't imagine what my life would have looked like without the people in it that have helped me become who I am. The ones that have experienced my highest highs and lowest lows, the ones who taught me how to dance and laugh and LIVE, the ones who watched me make mistakes and then helped me get up and fix them... each of my friendships is precious to me. But my friends do not define me. I am so much more than a friend.

Though I've spent more time at doctor's appointments this year than I EVER have, my health does not define me. Lately it's seemed like my headaches have taken over my life. I can't make it through a conversation without them sneaking their way in and stealing the focus! I literally can't get them out of my head! But I have to remind myself that my headaches do not define me. I am so much more than a diagnosis.

I attend an amazing church, but my church does not define me. I am extremely involved in Terranova. I attend every Sunday, help out in the mornings, meet with my family group every Wednesday, go to fun events, and see people in my church "family" in my everyday life. But my church does not define me. I am so much more than a Terranovan.

I love to scrapbook, paint, create and doodle. I play the bassoon and the piano. I love to smile. I have dealt with depression. I am terrible at sports. I enjoy baking. I live in Georgetown, TX USA. I have a wonderful family. I have green(sometimes blue) eyes. I like to read. And shop. And listen to music. And journal. I want to open my own business someday.

But I am so much more than an artist. I'm more than a bad athlete, a great baker, and a music lover. I'm more than a green-eyed, sometimes depressed, smiling musician. I'm not just an aspiring entrepreneur, a sister, a daughter, a reader, an American.

None of these things define me.

I am who I am. Not like in the Bible or anything (Ex. 3:14). I just mean that I am me. I am who God made me. I'm not sure I like the idea of being "defined", but if anyone could define me, it would be God. He created me and He knows me.

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
¹⁶ your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:13-16)

I am many things. And there are so many aspects to my life. But I am ever-changing and ever-growing. I cannot be put into a mold or a box. I won't fit. There are no limits when the limitless Lord is living through me.

This life is a journey, and I still don't know much about myself. But I am trying not to live by any definition that others have given me. And I am striving to keep from defining others by what they do, what they like, and what roles they play in life. People are mysteries that can't be solved and I love learning and putting the pieces together.